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A Modern Parable

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Keith Browning

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This was posted in the Ford Message Boards.

 

Quote:

 

A Japanese company (Toyota ) and an American company (FordMoCo )

decided to have a canoe race on the Missouri River. Both teams practiced long and hard to reach their peak performance before the race.

 

On the big day, the Japanese won by a mile.

 

The Americans, very discouraged and depressed, decided to investigate the reason for the crushing defeat. A management team made up of senior management was formed to investigate and recommend appropriate action. Their conclusion was the Japanese had 8 people rowing and 1 person steering, while the American team had 8 people steering and 1 person rowing.

 

Feeling a deeper study was in order, American management hired a consulting company and paid them a large amount of money for a second opinion. They advised, of course, that too many people were steering the boat, while not enough people were rowing. Not sure of how to utilize that information, but wanting to prevent another loss to the Japanese, the rowing team's management structure was totally reorganized to 4 steering supervisors, 3 area steering superintendents and 1 assistant superintendent steering manager. They also implemented a new performance system that would give the 1 person rowing the boat greater incentive to work harder. It was called the "Rowing Team Quality First Program," with meetings, dinners and free pens for the rower. There was discussion of getting new paddles, canoes and other equipment, extra vacation days for practices and bonuses.

 

The next year the Japanese won by two miles.

 

Humiliated, the American management laid off the rower for poor performance, halted development of a new canoe, sold the paddles, and canceled all capital investments for new equipment. The money saved was distributed to the Senior Executives as bonuses and the next year's racing team was out-sourced to India.

 

Sadly, The End.

 

Sad, but oh so true! Here's something else to think about: Ford has spent the last thirty years moving all its factories out of the US, claiming they can't make money paying American wages. Toyota has spent the last thirty years building more than a dozen plants inside the US. The last quarter's results: Toyota makes 4 billion in profits while Ford racked up 9 billion in losses. Ford folks are still scratching their heads....

 

 

 

Signed: anonymous .. (never mind the login I.D. ....) /forums/images/%%GRAEMLIN_URL%%/wink.gif

 

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A rewrite... the tail wags the dog.....

 

A non-onion company and a company bound up with onion rules decided to have a canoe race...

 

The team from the non-onion company knew that you need one clear leader to do well.... The onion company waited while the onion members held talks on what kind of canoe to buy, what colour it should be and whether or not a shift bonus was in order. The race deadline arrived before the vote was ratified and they had to borrow a boat from an onion boat rental shop... it sank since the canoe was maintained by canoe fixers that belonged to the canoe fixers onion and while they all saw the leaks, it wasn't their job to fix them... that guy was on sick leave.... He wasn't really sick, but the onion assured him of lots of time he could call in sick...

 

The onion members demanded that management fix the problem... but management couldn't fire the onion members... their hands were tied.

 

Trade onions ensure mediocrity.. they reward mediocrity... There's no sense in trying harder or being better because all the mediocre people will be mad at you for making them look bad....

 

Management is simply clearing out the bank account before the onion claims it all...

 

Just thinking about onions makes my eyes water....

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Me? In an onion shop??? Wouldn't take me long to be sharing digs with Jimmy Hoffa......

 

I'm sure that I would be extremely popular with onion supporters and leaders alike....

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