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For those who cant read the Ford Message Forums

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Tony302600

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There is a post of "Stupidest thing you've seen a tech do" on the Ford message boards, so i thought you guys who cant read it would get a kick out of it.

 

"saw a tech jump a starter solenoid on an old bronco once, truck was in gear, took off across the shop about 20 feet into a bulk tank of trans fluid (500 gallons) and harpooned the tank with the trailer hitch. had quite a nice flood!"

 

"I saw a Tech. pull a municipal septic truck in a bay and get called to another job, another tech. was ask to finish the work on the truck it was an L800 , he went to back it out and when I looked over he had flipped the pump lever thinking it was the parking brake......... he unloaded 1/4 of the load before he figured it out. I still laugh about that."

 

"I saw a Tech. pull a municipal septic truck in a bay and get called to another job, another tech. was ask to finish the work on the truck it was an L800 , he went to back it out and when I looked over he had flipped the pump lever thinking it was the parking brake......... he unloaded 1/4 of the load before he figured it out. I still laugh about that."

 

"Saw one guy open a metal fuel filter that he just took off with his cut off wheel, of course it lite up on fire, lite his coolant bucket on fire which he used to catch the fuel into, kicked that out of they way of truck, caught his boots on fire, spilled coolant bucket on floor, it was on fire... all rolling down into the floor drain ..... s t u p i d !"

 

"Saw one guy open a metal fuel filter that he just took off with his cut off wheel, of course it lite up on fire, lite his coolant bucket on fire which he used to catch the fuel into, kicked that out of they way of truck, caught his boots on fire, spilled coolant bucket on floor, it was on fire... all rolling down into the floor drain ..... s t u p i d !"

 

"this is a classic! tech was installing 4 mudflaps on an 06 explorer which was being delivered to customer right after that(customer was ex CIA) tech installed the mud flaps into the forward part of the wheel well on the rear thereby sealing the rear doors shut,tech used FIVE INCH SCREWS! Then the tech released the vehicle,,,,, STONED MUCH"

 

"Had a helper take a customer's car to the bank.Customer worked at said bank,drove car back to dealership w/spare keys.Helper exits bank to find car missing,walks back to sm's office, & tried to tell him he got "carjacked" on test drive,all while customer & dealer owner on conference call w/service manager regarding unauthorized "road tests"..."

 

"just thought of another one- tech put new brakes on car, gets in car speeds off rack backwards with no brakes (of course) rams floor jack through concrete wall then slams the car into drive and peeled forward rams his toolbox into the wall in front of him. the whole shop was in the floor laughing. But the bad thing about it was all the bosses were standing in front of the service dept. with a FORD REP!!!!!!! They saw everything!!!!!!!"

 

Ive done this "we had aguy here, not too bright not very paitent, spent 15-20 min beating a front rotor off of a explorer, well it finally came off and he continued to beat while its laying on the ground!!!"

 

"For about a year I worked next to a guy who usually came in friday mornings "under the weather"& would often sleep through lunch in whatever car he was working on-occasionally having me(the young idiot)raise the car up so no one would bother him.One friday I left in a hurry & forgot to let the car down or wake him up.The police report concluded that the motion sensors were triggered by his falling 5 feet to the ground as he was found unconsious by the local law enforcement sent to investigate the alarm.I was obviously not his favorite person after that..."

 

"Different tech (still from our heavy line shop). Showed up to work late. Completed oil change, didn't know or didn't care that it was a waiter and spent an hour running personal errands in the customer's vehicle. When the service manager called him on his cel phone and told him to return with the vehicle, he brought it back and proceeded to pass gas just before exiting the vehicle. Lady leaned into vehicle just enough to attempt to buckle in child car seat, pulled back gasping and nearly vomitted. She stated that the tech must be very sick and he should be taken to the hospital."

 

"I saw a rookie tech grease the brake caliper nipple, where it suppost to bleed the brakes !! LOL"

 

"Trans guy at nearby FORD dealer replaced clutch in a cobra and said well lets see what she'll do so while on Indy style r/t a Corvette pulled up next to him at a light and was mouthing off about something and my buddy said to himself come on man lets see what that vettes made of,he's banging gears,the cobra gets a little sideways but all ok til next light.Looks over and the guy in the vette is still mouthing off,this went on for three lites when my buddy says I'll roll the window down to hear this clown and the goy in the vette yells hey! you bastard thats my car....nice."

 

"I know a tech that was replacing deck lid lift shocks on a Town Car outside of the shop. He climbed into the trunk feet and all. He popped the fist shock off and the decklid slamed shut! He was stuck in the trunk until another tech was passing by and noticed tapping noises coming from the quarter panel of the Town Car. He was traped for about 20 minutes"

 

"Then there is this story that I regret telling but I am going to anyway, about a two weeks ago I came into work early load my tool cart was ready to be progressive, I was thinking about this job didn't pay attention to anything hook my air ratchet up went to use it it wouldn't work tried it again got very mad went to the back door of the shop launched into the scrap metal pile found out later they turned off the air compressor and drained it the night before, old faithful the air ratchet met its match that day"

 

"Not a tech but funny. A customer of mine had bought a 2005 f-350 4X4 lariat powerstroke. He had about 8 bales of hay in the back and went to feed his cattle, he got the bright idea to put the truck in 4x4 low, put it in gear and let it drive itself while he rode in the back flaiking off the hay....It worked great..........He jumped out and went to the door and it was locked (the auto locking doors) he tried breaking the windows out and couldn't!..........He watched helplessly as it did a swan dive off a 40 ft cliff into the creek below!!......Totaled out!.....His insurance guy did not like him at all!"

 

"Watched a tech hold up a driveshaft on his shoulder to reinstall while vehicle up on lift. When all the bolts were torqued he dropped his wrench and realized he couldn't get his head out (stuck between the driveshaft and gas tank. I let him stand there while I went to break and brought him a wrench after a few min."

 

 

This is the best one ....

 

"Taking a Police car back to the yard the tech saw the shuttle van fly by him, he decided to pull him over and the shuttle driver seeing it was the tech just went on driving. A under cover police officer thought it was a pursuit and joined in the chase. OPPS...ending up at the dealership with 5 police units a chopper and swat team behind..Service Director speachless, manager freaking out, and detailers running for cover..."

 

 

There are soo many more, but those are the ones that have kept us laughing.

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Very good Tony, Reminds me of the time at the Honda dealer quite a few years back. Tech does a 4 wheel brake job on a 91 Accord, get's done with it lowers it down backs it out of the bay and procedes to the automatic shop door, now mind you he did not pump up the brakes, needless to say drove the car right thru the shop door. Of course this during December, very chilly afternoon.

 

Had another one, a Honda Passport, tech pulled the engine and didn't support the rear of the truck, up went the truck on the lift and off it fell backwards.

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Thanks, Tony... adds a bright spot to the day... I'll have to find some time to dredge up some of the posts from the Canadian message board...

 

One I did witness myself..... the tech filled the truck with oil and backed the truck directly out of his bay into a spot in the line - up.... maybe 70ish feet.... I asked him if he ran the engine to check for leaks and then verified the correct oil level after (I'm anal about stuff like that)... "You bet!!". Then I pointed to the brand new oil filter on his bench and the trail of oil starting in his bay and ending under the freshly parked truck.....

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I asked him if he ran the engine to check for leaks and then verified the correct oil level after (I'm anal about stuff like that)... "You bet!!". Then I pointed to the brand new oil filter on his bench and the trail of oil starting in his bay and ending under the freshly parked truck.....

 

Dont you just LOVE that pivital moment when an overly confident cocky lie meets the painful exhibition of reality? Or the immediate change in someone's expression at the very moment they realize they fucked-up?

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I think that, in my headlong rush into my "golden years", I am becoming more and more curmudgeonly... Its almost like I live for moments like that these days...

 

Of course, we've had a steady parade of "new meat" in the trade this last while.... We are absolutely horny for warm bodies.... unfortunately, we are meeting too many that just don't live up to their "advertising"....

 

One young fellow... green as grass with only a little over a year in the business (working in another Ford shop) watched me do a caster sweep and asked what this "machine with all the wires was"..... I can only wonder what they did for alignments at his previous shop....

 

Today... the 04 Freestar with the low tire warning lit.... Started right after the new tires were put on at the tire shop... (Remember I said 04).... Since there were no transmitter valve stems obvious, the tire shop *MUST* have destroyed a new style transponder.... right?

 

This customer returned to the shop three times before "they" finally let me in on their dirty little secret...Of course they consulted the correct WSM.... the one that would have told them that this system relies on ABS wheel speed sensors for input.... the one that would have told them how to reset the message centre properly..... <SIGH>.....

 

I see the "stupid human.... errrr, technician tricks" thread has seen new life.... gonna be some good reading tonight....

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I just had to read some of the odd stories on INFORD... so for the first hillarious one that I came by, I will quote Dan Zabukovec...

"I had a lady with an old town car her problem"the radio doesn't get many stations". I bring it into the shop and see the power ant. in the back doesn't go up. I pop the trunk and and stick my head in when I notice that theres this live chicken staring at me! Before it can jump out I slam the lid shut and get the lady. She says she just bought it and was on her way home. "no problem" she says, picks up the chicken and goes and sits in the waiting room with it until I finish with her car. 2 things about all this (1) it was a very well behaved chicken and (2) where do you buy a live chicken in Mississauga?"

 

I'm sure we'll find some more...

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